Guides for Happy Marriages

Marriages can't be perfect. Couples will always have something to argue about. Diversities of personalities and beliefs sometimes bring people together but often becomes the reason for fights and misunderstanding. If not resolved, these may cause separation and broken marriages.

Let's learn from this story the secret of a happy marriage.

The Secret to a Lasting Marriage: Embrace Imperfection

Deb Graham

When I was a little girl, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.

On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom, and ask me how my day was at school.

I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite! When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast. And I'll never forget what

he said: "Baby, I love burned toast."
Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said,"Debbie, your momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real

tired. And besides­a little burnt toast never hurt anyone!"

In bed that night, I thought about that scene at dinner...and the

kindness my daddy showed my mom. To this day, it's a cherished memory

from my childhood that I'll never forget. And it's one that came to

mind just recently when Jack and I sat down to eat dinner.

I had arrived home late...as usual...and decided we would have

breakfast food for dinner. Some things never change, I suppose!

To my amazement, I found the ingredients I needed, and quickly began

to cook eggs, turkey sausage, and buttered toast. Thinking I had

things under control, I glanced through the mail for the day. It was

only a few minutes later that I remembered that I had forgotten to

take the toast out of the oven!

Now, had it been any other day -- and had we had more than two pieces

of bread in the entire house -- I would have started all over. But it

had been one of those days and I had just used up the last two pieces

of bread. So burnt toast it was!

As I set the plate down in front of Jack, I waited for a comment

about the toast. But all I got was a "Thank you!" I watched as he ate

bite by bite, all the time waiting for some comment about the toast.

But instead, all Jack said was, "Babe, this is great. Thanks for

cooking tonight. I know you had a hard day."

As I took a bite of my charred toast that night, I thought about my

mom and dad...how burnt toast hadn't been a deal-breaker for them.

And I quietly thanked God for giving me a marriage where burnt toast

wasn't a deal-breaker either!

You know, life is full of imperfect things...and imperfect people.

I'm not the best housekeeper or cook. And you might be surprised to

find out that Jack isn't the perfect husband! He likes to play his

music too loud, he will always find a way to avoid yard work, and he

watches far too many sports. Believe it or not, watching "Golf

Academy" is not my idea of a great night at home!

But somehow in the past 37 years Jack and I have learned to accept

the imperfections in each other. Over time, we have stopped trying to

make each other in our own mold and have learned to celebrate our

differences. You might say that we've learned to love each other for

who we really are!

For example, I like to take my time, I'm a perfectionist, and I'm

even-tempered. I tend to work too much and sleep too little. Jack, on

the other hand, is disciplined, studious, an early riser, and is a

marketer's dream consumer. I count pennies and Jack could care less!

Where he is strong, I am weak, and vice versa.

And while you might say that Jack and I are opposites, we're also

very much alike. I can look at him and tell you what he's thinking. I

can predict his actions before he finalizes his plans. On the other

hand, he knows whether I'm troubled or not the moment I enter a room.

We share the same goals. We love the same things. And we are still

best friends. We've traveled through many valleys and enjoyed many

mountaintops. And yet, at the same time, Jack and I must work every

minute of every day to make this thing called "marriage" work!

What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each

other's faults - and choosing to celebrate each other's differences -

is the one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing,

and lasting marriage relationship.

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Learning From The Seed

As adults, we serve as role models to young people. The questions is: how good models are we? They say you reap what you plant so let's be careful with what we teach and show our youngsters. Read this inspiring anecdote.


The Seed (A very nice anecdote)

A successful businessman was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business.

Instead of choosing one of his directors or his children, he decided to do something different. He called all the young executives in his company together.

He said, 'It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO. I have decided to choose one of you.' The young executives were shocked, but the boss continued. 'I am going to give each one of you a SEED today - one very special SEED. I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you. I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO.'

One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story.

She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed.

Everyday, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow. Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew. Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing. By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.

Six months went by - still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however. He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil - He so wanted the seed to grow.

A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection. Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened. Jim felt sick at his stomach, it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right. He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful -- in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed, a few felt sorry for him!

When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives. Jim just tried to hide in the back. 'My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown,' said the CEO. 'Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!' All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the financial director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified. He thought, 'The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!'

When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his Seed - Jim told him the story.

The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, 'Behold your next Chief Executive! His name is Jim!'

Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed. How could he be the new CEO the others said?

Then the CEO said, 'One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today.

But, I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow. All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers.

When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive!'

If you plant honesty, you will reap trust.
If you plant goodness, you will reap friends.
If you plant humility, you will reap greatness.
If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment.
If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective.
If you plant hard work, you will reap success.
If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation.

So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.

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A Glass of Milk Saved a Life

Kindness pays. Read another wonderful story on how kindness saved the life of an old woman.

A Glass of Milk

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry.

He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.

She thought he looked hungry so she brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it so slowly, and then he asked, How much do I owe you?"

You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness."

As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.

Many year's later that same young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. The finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease.

Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes.

Immedi ately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once.

He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to her case.


After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words ...

"Paid in full with one glass of milk"

(Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.

Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank You, God, that Your love has spread broad through human hearts and hands."

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Appreciating What We Lack

I had a very tiring day today. I spent a whole day touring places and taking notes of everything. I was spent and wasted.

At this point, I realized something -- I again would experience being excited to go to bed. Why?


I would always remember Joey de Leon, the comedian, who always say the best time to sleep is when you are so tired and needed sleep so much that once you rest your head in your pillow, it would feel like heaven.

The secret in being happy lies in appreciating what we lack or don't have. We always look and desire for something that is not in our hands. Why not turn this negative behavior into a positive one. Instead of wallowing that you're so tired or so stressed, think --- this is the best time for you to relax and feel the warmness and softness of your bed. Think positively and be happy. :)



be as delicious and wonderful as heaven again. Read more...

Kindness Pays... Another Inspiring Story

Some time ago, I have watched the movie Evan Almighty and aside from it being funny, I just can't forget the meaning of ARK from the movie:

A - act of
R - random
K - kindness

The movie highlighted the importance of helping others and providing random kindness to anyone who needs it. I would like to share with you another great story about a scavenger who received wonderful grace from someone he has helped a long time ago. It's very heart warming and of course, full of lessons in life.

Enjoy reading.

THE HOMELESS MAN AND THE CEO
A street scene:

The man slowly looked up. This was a woman clearly accustomed to the finer things of life. Her coat was new. She looked like that she had never missed a meal in her life. His first thought was that she wanted to make fun of him, like so many others had done before.

"Leave me alone," he growled.

To his amazement, the woman continued standing. She was smiling -- her even white teeth displayed in dazzling rows.

"Are you hungry?" she asked.

"No," he answered sarcastically. "I've just come from dining with the president. Now go away." The woman's smile became even broader. Suddenly the man felt a gentle hand under his arm.

"What are you doing, lady?" the man asked angrily. "I said to leave me alone.

Just then a policeman came up. "Is there any problem, ma'am?" he asked.

"No problem here, officer," the woman answered. "I'm just trying to get this man to his feet. Will you help me?"

The officer scratched his head. "That's old Jack. He's been a fixture around here for a couple of years. What do you want with him?"

"See that cafeteria over there?" she asked. "I'm going to get him something to eat and get him out of the cold for awhile."

"Are you crazy, lady?" the homeless man resisted. "I don't want to go in there!" Then he felt strong hands grab his other arm and lift him up.

"Let me go, officer. I didn't do anything."

"This is a good deal for you, Jack," the officer answered. "Don't blow it."

Finally, and with some difficulty, the woman and the police officer got Jack into the cafeteria and sat him at a table in a remote corner. It was the middle of the morning, so most of the breakfast crowd had already left and the lunch bunch had not yet arrived. The manager strode across
the cafeteria and stood by his table.

"What's going on here, officer?" he asked. "What is all this. Is this man in trouble?"

"This lady brought this man in here to be fed," the policeman answered.

"Not in here!" the manager replied angrily. "Having a person like that here is bad for business."

Old Jack smiled a toothless grin. "See, lady. I told you so. Now will you let me go. I didn't want to come here in the first place."

The woman turned to the cafeteria manager and smiled. "Sir, are you familiar with Eddy and Associates, the banking firm down the street?"

"Of course I am," the manager answered impatiently. "They hold their weekly meetings in one of my banquet rooms."

"And do you make a goodly amount of money providing food at these weekly meetings?"

"What business is that of yours?"

"I, sir, am Penelope Eddy, president and CEO of the company."

"Oh."

The woman smiled again. "I thought that might make a difference."

She glanced at the cop who was busy stifling a giggle. "Would you like to join us in a cup of coffee and a meal, officer?"

"No thanks, ma'am," the officer replied. "I'm on duty."

"Then, perhaps, a cup of coffee to go?"

"Yes, ma'am. That would be very nice."

The cafeteria manager turned on his heel "I'll get your coffee for you right away, officer."

The officer watched him walk away. "You certainly put him in his place," he said.

"That was not my intent. Believe it or not, I have a reason for all this."

She sat down at the table across from her amazed dinner guest She stared at him intently. "Jack, do you remember me?"

Old Jack searched her face with his old , rheumy eyes "I think so -- I mean you do look familiar."

"I'm a little older perhaps," she said. "Maybe I've even filled out more than in my younger days
when you worked here, and I came through that very door, cold and hungry."

"Ma'am?" the officer said questioningly. He couldn't believe that such a magnificently turned out woman could ever have been hungry.

"I was just out of college," the woman began. "I had come to the city looking for a job, but I couldn't find anything. Finally I was down to my last few cents and had been kicked out of my apartment. I walked the streets for days. It was February and I was cold and nearly starving. I saw this place and walked in on the off chance that I could get something to eat."

Jack lit up with a smile. "Now I remember," he said. "I was behind the serving counter. You came up and asked me if you could work for something to eat. I said that it was against company policy."

"I know," the woman continued. "Then you made me the biggest roast beef sandwich that
I had ever seen, gave me a cup of coffee, and told me to go over to a corner table and enjoy it. I was afraid that you would get into trouble. Then, when I looked over, I saw you put the price of my food in the cash register I knew then that everything would be all right."

"So you started your own business?" Old Jack said.

"I got a job that very afternoon. I worked my way up. Eventually I started my own business, that, with the help of God, prospered."

She opened her purse and pulled out a business card. "When you are finished here, I want you to pay a visit to a Mr. Lyons. He's the personnel director of my company.

I'll go talk to him now and I'm certain he'll find something for you to do around the office." She smiled. "I think he might even find the funds to give you a little advance so that you can buy some clothes and get a place to live until you get on your feet. If you ever need anything, my door is
always open to you."

There were tears in the old man's eyes. "How can I ever thank you? " he said.

"Don't thank me," the woman answered. "To God goes the glory. Thank Jesus. He led me to you."

Outside the cafeteria, the officer and the woman paused at the entrance before going their separate ways. "Thank you for all your help, Officer," she said.

"On the contrary, Ms. Eddy," he answered. "Thank you. I saw a miracle today, something that I will
never forget. And...And thank you for the coffee."

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